As I was experimenting with my diet throughout the fall and winter, I put on weight. Being raised in an era where weight gain was criticized, judged, and even shamed, putting on a few pounds can send me into a spiral. Thankfully, I have also met people who have taught me that gaining weight is not such a big deal. What?! You mean I don’t have to shy away from photographs and keep myself covered? “No. Not even one little bit,” they’ve told me. Well, I’ll be damned! What a load of crap I’ve been served for the past 45+ years. My new friends have helped me come to peace with the fact that my body is always changing, and it’s always going to be changing.
My family happened to go on vacation while I was carrying some of these extra pounds. And ya know what? The entire time we were away, I made a mindful choice to happily hop into every family photo and bathing-suit opportunity available. I was actually surprised by how empowering it was to make a conscious decision to not allow my weight to carry so much weight.
Don’t get me wrong, carrying extra pounds never feels comfortable to me. Even my knees and my heart rate monitor at the gym let me know just how much harder my body has to work to move when my size changes. That can be enough to motivate me to head back down the scale. But, I think making adjustments to my food plan has become easier since being introduced to a completely new perspective on size, health, and my deranged self-criticism around it.
We’re all constantly experiencing different stages in our lives. It’s so silly how some of these stages can still have shame attached to them—it’s old fashioned, really. I’m hoping, the more I embrace–and am transparent about–my life’s many stages, the more my self-acceptance will invite others to be at peace with theirs. So whether it’s weight, a lost job, trouble with a kid, or a relationship, let’s wear it all with compassion and acceptance about where we’re at, and what promising direction those experiences will lead us to in the future.
This is how I put it together that we learn from one another…
Monkey See Monkey Do – If I don’t know what it looks like, I can’t do it.
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Andrea Basel says:
Thank you for your willingness to share your journey and enlighten ? mine!!
mags says:
Ditto Andrea!
I’m taking notes over here…
I’m taking notes!
Jj says:
Another great message when it was needed
mags says:
It’s crazy, right?
And we always look back on photos and think, “Geeze I looked so good, why did I think I needed to lose 10 pounds then?”
Rachel Joffe says:
Truth!!! Thanks- You always hit the nail on the head.
mags says:
Thank you Rachel~
Lisa Sacks says:
Thank you for your honesty. A welcome message to hear and really take in.
mags says:
Thank you Lisa.
It feels like a message that we all need to keep hearing, I know I do!
Christine Woodside says:
I was thinking a great deal about this myself as I wrote my new book — it took me into this territory of growing up with shaming around weight. Thanks for this wonderful post!
mags says:
It’s deep heavy stuff, right?
Thank you for taking the time to comment.
And, I hope your new book is going well!!!
** CONGRATULATIONS, THAT’S SO EXCITING **
Ginger Wessel says:
Mags – this is great! I really needed this today! Love you and love your posts!
mags says:
GINGER!
That’s so wonderful to hear.
Given by the amount of feedback I’ve received from this post, I don’t think we’re the only ones feeling like there’s, “Too much weight on weight.”
It feels so good to get it out there and talk about it!
Thank you for taking the time to comment~