With the holidays approaching, I have guilt on my mind. Let’s be honest, for some of us, guilt is as much a part of Yuletide as cursing at Christmas lights. 

For so many years, I was doing things the way I was taught to do them or how I thought others wanted them done. What I didn’t realize was that my actions were very often motivated by guilt. Guilt brings me where other people want to go—it never brings me where I want to go. Guilt creeps up like an unwanted holiday visitor, but I’m done with it being my Global Positioning System.

It’s time to stop the cycle. I’m simply not ok with making others feel bad about making decisions that support their mental and emotional wellbeing—no matter if I understand their reasoning or not. That belief comes as a direct result of acting on behalf of my own personal well-being and experiencing the freedom that offers me and my family. It comes from advocating for myself and watching the people who love me compassionately accepting a change in plans. When I stop allowing guilt to control me, I stop using it to control other people.