Years ago I used to take whatever was going on in my day out on other people. My grump would have nothing to do with them of course, but that’s not what I thought. I hollered about the shoes being left out, the door that wasn’t shut all the way, the dish that didn’t get rinsed enough before it went into the dishwasher—you name it. You’re my real problem, not me.

When I trace back my mood back to where it went south, I quickly realize it’s actually not the person in front of me who I’m pissed at. It’s from staying up too late, or because that thing fell through, or that I’m not eating right, or all of the above. Sprinkle in a little end-of-the-work-day-hunger, and my mood is heading us straight into everyone-is-my-enemy territory.

Now, when I’m extra ragey with everyone, I think to myself, What’s going on right now? Is this really about the empty boxes in the pantry that kids were too lazy to throw out? Yes, sometimes it absolutely is, Sally slackers. But more often than not, it’s something else.

When I feel my blood boiling the second I walk into the house, I’ve learned to say, “You know what? I love you, but I’m not in a place where I can listen-with-love to what your brother did to you with the plunger right now. We can chat later when I’m in a better place. Oh, and before I go into my room—it would be best for your future if the house is picked up by the time I come out. Peace out, tiny Cub Scout.”

Right now? I’m pretty much annoyed with them all the time, so I need this message more than anyone this week. I am trying to do waaay too much. It’s time to take things off my list… How many sleeps till September 8th?