This weekend G-Man and I will be celebrating our 23rd wedding anniversary. Anniversaries feel like the perfect time to reflect on the differences between my husband and me. This week, let’s highlight the contrast between detail-oriented people and get-it-done people.
Do I have to tell you guys which is which in our relationship? Well—juuust in case you’re new to TeamConfessions, I’m going to confirm that yes, I am the detail-oriented person, and G-Man Master De is my get-it-done guy.
Let’s start by talking about how much I resented get-it-done guy 23 years ago. It used to drive me loco that my husband seemed to do everything 70%. Then I realized, and I talk about this in the episode, Enough Dysmorphia – Unconsciously Doing Everything 110%, that get-it-done guy has been the biggest blessing of this micromanaging-perfectionist-martyr’s life. While I’ll never get back the countless hours wasted doing eve-ry-thing more thoroughly than it ever had to be done, my evolution from resentment to acceptance in this arena has brought so much more peace into our relationship. And, much like other things I’ve learned from my husband, I went ahead and took a page out of his book! Team, you should see how half-assed I do things now—you’d be so proud of me!
BUT—did you guys feel a “buuut” coming?
Buuuut, I think it’s important in the relationship not only to accept the get-it-done approach but to acknowledge that the get-it-done-just-right approach is also very helpful, and even necessary in some circumstances.
Let me offer some examples for you…
As my eyes have been opened to both of these approaches, I have to admit, for most things, getting it done is all that’s necessary. But it’s helpful to acknowledge those times when getting it done just right is what the project needs. I think the most important thing in our relationship around this topic is that we need to decide which approach we’re going to use before we start the project.
And I’d like to share this back-and-forth between G and me before I leave you.
We were making our bed together, and I said to him,
“Sometimes I feel like you don’t even know what ‘straight’ is.”
And he replied, “Yeah, but I definitely know what ‘straight enough’ is.”
And there you have it.
Ok, next week we’re going to be chatting about old dogs and new tricks, so be sure to check back with us next Friday. And until then, thanks so much for listening, TeamConfessioners!
Welcome to my blog turned podcast! Here you can listen or read about what’s on my mind as I try my best to recover from screaming at my kids and nagging the bejesus out my husband.
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kelly says:
Happy Anniversary to a great couple xoxo
Mags DePetris says:
Thanks so much Kelly!