Today is the final day of our four-week invitation to bring attention to how we speak to ourselves. If you’re a few weeks behind, I’ve put some links in the show notes so you can catch up with the rest of the Team.
As I keep mentioning, TeamConfessioners—when I first learned about this self-talk concept, I thought I was already being very kind to myself. And compared to where I came from—I was. But reading, Shad Helmstetter’s What to Say When You Talk to Yourself, helped me notice the more subtle negative messages I was pouring into my subconscious on a daily basis. And honestly, if Shad didn’t explain the science behind how our brains work, I might have categorized all of this positive self-talk stuff as a little “foo-foo.” Like, Are you kidding me with this? I’m never going to talk to myself like that. And PS—I’m not negative, I just tell it like it is.
But what’s come to my attention these past few weeks is that my “truth-telling” voice was often just an echo of old pathways—ones that kept me stuck in a negative self-image instead of a positive one. Throughout the month, I was able to catch myself. In moments when I’d normally say something abrasive, I’d pause and think, Is this really a message I want to keep repeating to myself?
This morning I was doing a guided meditation with friends. In it, the leader suggested something that I think completely applies to this work:
Rather than focusing on the darkness in my life,
focus on bringing the light.
Positive self-talk feels like a simple way to bring light—not just to myself, but to the people around me. And that feels like exactly what I want to spend my time doing at this stage of my life. Thank you, Shad!
So Team, how did it go? While doing this work, or just listening to these posts, did you identify any sharp edges that could use softening? Hopefully, this topic opened the door—even just a crack—to a kinder way of speaking to ourselves. Just a little awareness. That’s enough to start.
Next week we’re going to be talking about a lesson I should have learned in Kindergarten, but instead learned it at age fifty. So please be sure to tune in for that next time. Until then, thanks so much for joining me on our self-talk invitation Team, and I’ll catch you in February!
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