Hey TeamConfessions, I’m 50 now! I am officially older and wiser than I was last week and I’m so excited to rock that status as much as I possibly can for the next 50 years. And holy smokes—what a 50th birthday, Team! Given all of the incredible family-and-friend memories of the past weeks and months, this feels like the perfect time to reflect on gratitude.

Several months back, someone suggested I read the book, Manifest by Roxie Nafousi. The reason I want to talk with you about this today is not to discuss manifesting, but rather to share one of the gratitude practices that Roxie writes about in her book.

I don’t know about you guys, but as much as I completely recognize and honor the power of gratitude, the whole ‘make a gratitude list’ can get super stale for me. I’m grateful for my health, my kids, my husband, our dog, our home, blah, blah, blah. While Roxie encourages making a traditional gratitude list, she also offers another practice: writing down all the positive moments from the time you wake up to the time you fall asleep.

About a month ago I started doing this myself. At night, usually while watching TV, I’d list all the positive things I can think of: 

• Woke up in time to get all my morning tasks done.
• Someone gave me a compliment at the gym.
• My favorite computer at the library was free.
• My daughter got home early and I was able to visit with her before she headed to rec volleyball.
• Funny car ride home with my son from the train station. 
• Miss Butter Jones (not generally a snuggler) snuggled with me on the couch.
• Got to quickly catch up with both of the college kids on the phone.
• G Man helped reframe something that I was worried about regarding money and my business.

Sometimes I only write three things because I’m tired, sometimes I can’t stop writing because I keep thinking of heartwarming parts of my day. But, a benefit I quickly noticed as my day was unfolding was a renewed ability to be present in the moment. Because I was mentally keeping track of the positive experiences for my list, I began recognizing events as uplifting as they happened. 

Another development that surprised me was a shift in my ability to draw the good out of things that traditionally I would’ve categorized as negative. For example, I was going for blood work first thing in the morning. And, as I’m sure some of you listening can relate, I drove straight past the hospital, hopped on the highway and drove ten minutes away to the YMCA (where I go almost every morning.) While pulling into the gym, realizing what I had done, I just circled through the parking lot, whipped around, and got back on the highway. I didn’t spend the lost 20 minutes bad-girling myself. Instead, my focus was on the fact that I might have left enough time to make it back for my yoga class—which I actually did.

While I don’t know that I’m going to keep listing every single positive thing that has happened to me in a journal on a daily basis, I think this practice is the perfect thing to do around the dinner table. It’s also a great go-to habit when I’m trying to settle my brain at the end of a long day. And hey, maybe this simple gratitude practice can even help with the discomfort a controlling person feels when a house of four suddenly turns back into a house of six. Welcome back college students! (Team, my dishwasher is full by 10am.)

And while gratitude doesn’t empty dishwashers or pick up other people’s crap, it has been known to stop me from weaponizing the family group text with photos of other people’s stuff piled around my house. Let me be clear though, I’m not suggesting I’ve stopped sending the photos, Team—I just refrain from expressing in words how I truly feel about the little twerps thinking someone else is going to clean up after them. Gratitude—don’t fail us now!

Next week we’re going to be chatting about getting our needs met. For a long time I thought my needs had to be met by the precise person who I thought should meet them. Spoiler alert—that didn’t go so great. 

And another reminder to give the show a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts if you haven’t done so already. It really helps me out, Team. And thank you to those of you who have already taken the time to pop over there. These little things can make a big difference when it comes to algorithms and search science. Thanks so much TeamConfessioners!