This week I was reminded of how much our family life has changed since I stopped expecting our lives to revolve around what works best for me. For many years, I actually thought that was how it should be done. If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy, as they say. But, once I learned how to take a step back and observe, so much of our family life has shifted.

There’s this scene in season three of The Crown that put that change of perspective into words for me. An elderly Princess Alice says to her brother Lord Mountbatten,

“There came a moment, around the time I turned 70, when it dawned on me I was no longer a participant, rather a spectator.”

While I still have a healthy amount of participation years ahead of me, it feels wise, healthy, and beneficial to start this transition as soon as possible. 

I can report that after years of practice, I’m always pleasantly surprised by how much better things work out when I get out of the way. While I often have to choke down a big ol’ piece of humble pie, it’s a reminder that what’s best for the group is always what’s best.