In our family, it doesn’t matter if the car ride is one hour or five hours—we all seem to lose it in the last fifteen minutes of the journey. After studying this phenomenon for years, I’ve come to the conclusion: We lose it because we can. The end is near. You always have to pee the worst immediately before you find a bathroom, right? It’s because, pretty soon, you won’t have to hold it in anymore.

I don’t know if this summer has been tough because the kids bicker all day, or because I think about the loss of my brother all day. All I can tell you is, at this point, I am doing all I can to hold it together.

When the kids were younger, I used to let them play the Potty Mouth Game during the last part of a car trip. I wouldn’t let them swear, but I would allow them to say all those words we didn’t normally use in everyday conversation. There is something about hearing a three-year-old scream, “VAGINA!” at the top of their lungs that releases a lot of tension for me. 

At this time of year, the last thing I’m thinking about is breaking rules. I’m actually spending a great deal of my time fantasizing about all the rules I’m going to restore as soon as school starts: Bedtime rules, household rules, eating rules, TV rules, computer rules…I looooove me some rules. But if I have any chance at all of behaving through this last part of the ride, I might want to remember that when it comes to rules, life can get a whole lot easier if I spend less time making and more time breaking.