My first response to almost every request that passes my children’s lips is, “No.” Big requests, little requests, it doesn’t matter, just, “No.” You’re going to make a mess, This is going to mean more work for me, You’re always asking for stuff—“No. No. No.” As you can imagine, I really back myself into a corner because once the child is given the opportunity to plead their case, the ruling is often overturned (or, should be overturned). There are times when I marvel at how much my children argue with me, forgetting that I’m the very person who is fertilizing that crap. Why are they arguing with me? BECAUSE IT WORKS.

I train people how to treat me. If I don’t like how a particular relationship pattern is going, it can usually be traced back to how I continually react or respond to that person. If I want to change the pattern, I have to change my response to it.

Moving forward, I’m going to try my best to change from, “No,” to “Explain to me why you think that’s a good idea.” And, while I’m at it, I’m sure there are a lot of other Reactions of mine that could use a tune-up as well.