As embarrassing as this is to admit, I actually spent years thinking that a day would come when I would magically want to go to the gym. As if some fairy would fly by and grant me the desire to exercise. As it turns out, I just had to do it. Not because I wanted to, but because it made me feel better after I did it.

As I touched on in my post The Next Right Thing Isn’t Always Easy, this is the definition of maturity to me. I don’t work out, eat right, make my bed, go to sleep early and keep my mouth shut because I want to. I do those things because when I take care of myself and stop telling everyone else what to do, I feel better about myself. When I feel better about myself, I’m a kinder person. When I’m a kinder person, I feel better about myself—yeah, you get the point.

We have a tradition in our family: Each person is responsible for taking care of their own basic needs so they bring their most balanced self to the family unit. Everyone in this house is old enough to get the rest they need, the food they need and the exercise they need. We’re happy to give you love if you’re feeling left out, defeated or overwhelmed, but, it’s up to all of us as individuals, big and small, to set down the foundation for a balanced temperament.

My motivation for taking care of myself isn’t about ‘getting into that dress’ or ‘losing 15 pounds before vacation’ anymore. My motivation for staying committed to my exercise routine is that I want to ‘bring my most balanced self to the family unit,’ but more simply put—I really just don’t want to be an a-hole.